Let Me Pursue You – Chapter 85
Lu Shi Qing glanced at her clenched hands, not understanding where her nervousness came from, and frowned, “What’s wrong?”
Yuan Ci Xian choked up.
Originally, she didn’t want to disturb Shaohe anymore, and she also thought about not mentioning the secret between the two of them. After all, there were too many people in this world who want to know about the future. If Shaohe’s rebirth was caught by interested people, it would easily bring disaster to her.
But right now Xi Ju seemed to have already guessed Shaohe’s secret and was planning to use her. If Yuan Ci Xian continued to remain silent, and even concealed it from Lu Shi Qing, it was difficult to guarantee that it would not lead to bigger mistakes.
For now, Shaohe seemed to not be so easily persuaded by Xi Ju, but she had endured too much, and since she was in faraway land, the variables were even more unpredictable.
People’s hearts were complicated and easy to change, she dared not bet.
She stared fixedly at Lu Shi Qing, and after a long silence, she asked, “Have you ever thought that Shaohe might be a little different from us?”
Lu Shi Qing blinked lightly, beckoning her to continue.
“Last winter, as if she had expected it, she sent a secret letter reminding you to be careful when heading north; this year, on the first day of the First month, when I went to ask her for the jade ring, she was already waiting for me at the mansion as if she knew it in advance.” She pondered for a while, trying to explain in a way that most people could accept, “You also said that she has no chance to get in touch with those court secrets. If that’s the case, isn’t she too godly?”
Lu Shi Qing narrowed his eyes slightly.
Yuan Ci Xian knew that he somewhat listening, and after pondering for a while, she continued: “If we say that she knows the future, then these things can be explained.”
Lu Shi Qing looked at her sideways, seeing her serious expression his intention to laugh disappear, he shook his head silently and said, “If she had known earlier that Nanzhao Crown Prince wanted to ask His Majesty to marry her, it’s not impossible to avoid it.”
“Because the future has changed.” Yuan Ci Xian said firmly, “Maybe The future she knows is only the future that she once had.”
Lu Shi Qing twitched the corners of his mouth, said as if he still disagreed: “You mean to say that she experienced a life and relive it again, and now, the world has become different from the one she experienced. If so, who changed this life? If she’s the only one who knew, why doesn’t the world develop in a direction that was beneficial to her, and instead led her to embark on this marriage alliance? And you…” He paused, “why are you so certain of this absurd and inconceivable thing?”
Lu Shi Qing was really too smart, he almost hit the nail with these three questions, making Yuan Ci Xian suddenly froze in place.
He just kept his expressionless face, staring at her for a moment, as if wanting to see through her.
She opened her mouth, and the answer that came out of her mouth was choked back into her throat under his sharp gaze.
Yuan Ci Xian swallowed, lowered her eyes to reconstitute her emotions, raised her head and was about to muster up the courage to confide the dream to him, but saw that his expression had returned to normal, curled his lips and smiled: “You can’t be the one who changes the world, can you? If you know the future like her, can you still be deceived by me for a year?”
Yuan Ci Xian was slightly taken aback, and hurriedly said: “I am different from her, but I’m also…”
“Okay.” Lu Shi Qing interrupted her, “I know about Shaohe. Nanzhao’s side, I will find a way to pay attention to it. Now sleep.”
After he finished speaking, he quickly packed up the files, and for some reason, he turned off all the lights in the house, which was rare. In the darkness, he went back to the bed and lay down quietly, without saying anything.
Yuan Ci Xian’s heart suddenly beat very fast.
She intuitively felt that he seemed to have guessed something, so he deliberately didn’t give her a chance to speak. He didn’t want to hear her say that her initial approach to him was just to use him to change the future she knew.
What kind of emotions could make someone as clear-minded and self-aware as Lu Shi Qing choose to deceive himself?
He lay beside her, one foot away, neither hugging not hold her hand.
One bed, yet so far apart.
Yuan Ci Xian suddenly felt a heavy pressure in her heart, as if she was blocked by a million-pound boulder, making it difficult to even breathe.
After being suffocated for a while, she couldn’t help but move closer to him. Seeing that he seemed to be sleeping without any response, she reached out and pulled his sleeve, whispering, “Lu Shi Qing, I can’t sleep, can you hold me?”
Lu Shi Qing still didn’t move.
She waited and waited, afraid that he thought she approached with ulterior motive and felt disgusted, so she didn’t want to bother him anymore. She turned around silently and curled up on the other side of the bed with her arm as a pillow. But suddenly she heard him sigh behind her, and then she felt an arm wrap around her.
Lu Shi Qing hugged her tightly from behind and whispered in her ear, “It’s okay, sleep now.”
Yuan Ci Xian felt a twinge in her nose, turned around to face him, and hugged his waist, nodding. “You sleep too.”
There was no sound in the room. Yuan Ci Xian was in a daze and her mind was filled with thoughts of Lu Shi Qing. She was afraid that he would remain silent and struggle alone, but she was also afraid that he would question her and make her feel helpless.
As she thought this, it was already late at night, and Yuan Ci Xian was finally tired and fell asleep, but her sleep was not sound. Even in her dreams, she couldn’t escape from Lu Shi Qing’s presence.
She went back to Lu bridge again. It seemed to be raining lightly, and the raindrops made slight noises as they fell on the surface of the Lushui River. She heard faint mournful cries from the bridge in the dark and damp bluestone slabs, as if a procession was slowly approaching the Lu bridge.
There were not many people in this group, it took a short time to walk from one end of the bridge to the other, and there were only a few people weeping softly from the beginning to the end.
Yuan Ci Xian seemed to know what these movements meant, and was so anxious that she almost broke free from the shackles and rushed out.
But she was still trapped in the stone, and when they had gone far away, the surroundings became quiet. Then she heard an old man passing by sighed: “Originally a rich and powerful person, but now he’s gone just like that. He didn’t even get to enjoy his riches for a few more days. What a curse, what a curse.”
Another old man replied to him: “Perhaps he was killed by an unjust soul.”
A young man was also commenting: “Where did the unjust soul come from! So many people died that day during the palace revolt, it’s not impossible for a family member to seek revenge.”
“But how did I hear that Prime Minister Lu died of illness? They said he was stabbed in the chest a few years ago, and then fell into the root of the disease.”
“Who cares, it’s still a curse! Old Lady Lu is so pitiful, not to mention the white-haired person sending the black-haired person away, this Lu family didn’t even left behind an heir!”
Yuan Ci Xian became more and more anxious as she listened, her heart almost jumped out of her throat, but she suddenly heard someone calling her name, as if they were trying to pull her out of a deep abyss.
When she opened her eyes, she saw that the surroundings were bright, and it was already early in the morning. Lu Shi Qing was fully dressed and sat on the edge of the bed, staring at her with a frown.
She was covered with fine sweat, her temple hair was wet, her face was still covered with undried tears, and her eyes were bloodshot.
Seeing her wake up, he seemed to be relieved, stretched out his hand to touch her cold forehead, and asked, “What’s wrong?”
She seemed to have come back to her senses, grabbed his outstretched hand, then climbed him up, and slammed into his arms very fiercely, but did not say a single word.
Lu Shi Qing was slightly stunned, hugged her back, then looked down at the top of her head, and asked again: “What did you dream about?”
Yuan Ci Xian was choked by the question, and kept shaking her head.
Lu Shi Qing didn’t ask any more questions, just hugged her without saying a word, stroked her shoulder with his thumb, and waited for her to calm down before saying: “It’s chenshi (7-9am), get up and wash up, then have some breakfast.”
Yuan Ci Xian didn’t seem to hear it, she kept thinking about what she heard in her dream, and suddenly raised her head and asked him anxiously: “After the doctor examined you last time, did he really say it’s all right?”
Her voice was hoarse, mixed with a little nasal sound.
Lu Shi Qing didn’t know what this sudden question was all about, and guessed after a pause: “You mean my knife wound?”
She nodded anxiously. The last time she learned the truth, she had carefully inspected his wounds, and then forced him to invite the doctor who treated his wounds last time for another examination. The doctor said that he was recovering very well and it wouldn’t cause the root cause of the disease, so she was relieved.
Lu Shi Qing frowned: “It’s really all right.” He couldn’t help it now, and asked her, “What the hell are you dreaming about?”
Yuan Ci Xian didn’t know how to speak.
How could she tell him that she dreamed that he was dead, and there were only a few people who went to the funeral after his death, and he kept ridiculed by the people. How could she tell him that Xuan shi became a white-haired person who sent black-haired person, and in the end, she didn’t even hold a single grandson.
She gritted her teeth tightly, still shook her head, grabbed his shoulder and said, “How about letting another doctor take a look?”
Lu Shi Qing didn’t know whether to laugh or cry inside, but quickly restrained his expression, and after a long silence, he sighed and stroked the tear marks on her face: “Tell me everything you know. Tell me what you wanted to say last night but didn’t finish. Tell me now.”
Originally, the timing was right last night, and Yuan Ci Xian mustered up the courage to say it. But now she was disturbed by this new dream, her head seemed to be wrapped with a ball of twine, and she couldn’t figure it out for a while.
She frowned, pressed her slightly swollen temples, and said, “Let me think about where to start.”
Seeing her exhaustion, Lu Shi Qing couldn’t bear to remind her of painful memories, and said, “Just answer my question.”
She said “hmm”.
“I thought about it for a long time last night. I thought, maybe what you said is true. Like Shaohe, maybe she knows some things that ordinary people don’t. For example, when you helped bring down the Jiang family last time, you were able to provide the key information of “Lingnan”. It wasn’t just something you overheard by chance, but there seems to be some hidden meaning behind it. There was another time earlier, you told me that you had a dream, dreaming that you died a miserable death. In the dream, the Bodhisattva told you that if you can find a certain gentleman in Chang’an to become your backer, this dream will not become a bloody reality. These are not empty words, right?”
Yuan Ci Xian bit her lip, nodded after hesitating for a long time, lowered her eyes and said, “It’s not just me, but the entire Yuan family died miserably.”
She reincarnated into a block of stone. She then told him little by little what the people were talking about. From her father and brother’s rebellion, to the tragic death of the Yuan family, and then to the redress of the case many years later.
Hearing this, Lu Shi Qing slightly tightened the hand resting on her waist, and asked her: “Who redress the Yuan family’s case? What have I been doing all these years?”
Yuan Ci Xian shook her head: “I don’t know.”
“Then how do you know that the gentleman is me, and you should ask me to become your backer?”
She then explained that he initiated a palace revolt to force the emperor to abdicate and assist the Thirteen princes to ascend the throne.
Lu Shi Qing’s face changed slightly when he heard this. He was silent for a while, then asked as calmly as possible: “Is this what you mean back then, that you dreamed that I become a high-ranking official?”
Yuan Ci Xian didn’t expect him to remember her joke so clearly, she nodded and said, “They call you Prime Minister Lu, then you must be the Prime Minister of Palace Secretariat, the highest Prime Minister, and also the emperor’s teacher.”
Lu Shi Qing frowned: “What about Sixth Highness? You have always been hostile to him. Is it because he failed to ascend the throne in the end?”
She shook her head. When describing the Yuan family case just now, she didn’t mention Zheng Zhuo’s matter. She was afraid that Lu Shi Qing would find it hard to accept it for a while, and wanted pace the story and bring it up at the end, but now she had no choice but to answer: “It’s because someone said that I used to be Sixth Highness’s fiancée, but later, my father and elder brother both died under his knife.”
Lu Shi Qing was indeed shocked, and only recovered after a while. But he didn’t immediately make a conclusion, just continued to ask: “After Thirteenth Highness ascended the throne, is there any information about his whereabouts?”
Yuan Ci Xian frowned: “The information is too vague, I can only faintly judge that he died after me and before Thirteenth Highness ascended the throne. Someone said…” It was a bit difficult for her to speak, so she paused.
Lu Shi Qing seemed to have guessed it: “They said, I killed him?”
She nodded: “That’s roughly what it means. They said that you brought down several princes in those years. Maybe the sudden death of Sixth Prince was also related to you.”
She frowned after she said it, afraid that this matter would touch a nerve, so she added: “But everything I dreamed is what I heard, and most of them are casual comments of people with no political savvy, so the big matters are credible, but the details may not be true.”
“I know.” Lu Shi Qing frowned and said, “I will make the judgment.”
Just as he finished speaking, he heard a knock on the door. It was Cao An saying that Cai He’s affairs had made progress and wanted to report to him.
He was silent, let go of Yuan Ci Xian and said: “I’ll go out first, you get up and eat something.”
According to Yuan Ci Xian’s temperament, it was natural to tell him to go quickly, but now she was a little rattle after waking up from a nightmare, and unwilling to loosen his sleeves.
Lu Shi Qing looked down and said helplessly, “Don’t worry, your backer won’t fall for the time being.”
She felt even more uncomfortable when she heard this, and wrapped her two snow-white arms around his neck: “Won’t fall for the time being, nor in the future.”
Lu Shi Qing nodded: “I won’t fall in the future.”
She said “um”, stared at him for a while, and said seriously: “Lu Shi Qing, if now I am given a chance to go back to a year ago, I swear I will treat you sincerely from the beginning. But I may not be so lucky doing it all over again, so from now on, I will be also your backer, will this make you feel more at ease?”
Lu Shi Qing sneered. He was already quite at ease. There were so many powerful people in the whole capital, but she chose to use him, this was his ability. He was happy.
But he didn’t really want to give up this opportunity of being repaid by her, so he said, “I don’t need a backer, let’s change to something else.”
“Then what do you want?”
He looked down at her and smiled.
He wants, lots and lots of hills.