Chapter 54 Part 2

 

Pei Xiaoyuan followed the palace eunuch for a while in the palace, and then turned into the road beside the city wall, where a horse was parked. He mounted the horse and walked along the deserted city wall alone, went out of Yanxing Gate, and followed several palace guards waiting outside the city gate for ten to twenty miles in the suburbs, and finally stopped in front of a slope.

Outside the eastern city gate of Yanxing, a vast wasteland stretched out, known as a long-standing mass grave. It was the final resting place for countless unclaimed corpses. Beggars, starving people, abandoned corpses, beheaded criminals, and tens of thousands of refugees who died in the chaos that broke the city in the past.

At this moment, perhaps there were a few dry bones of unknown origin being stepped on by him.

He saw his superior, General Han Kerang, standing nearby. On the slope ahead, a sedan chair was parked with a man sitting on it. The man had his back to him, facing the wilderness below the slope, his figure motionless.

Han Kerang saw him, nodded slightly, and motioned him to go forward.

Pei Xiaoyuan slowly approached and knelt down in front of the man’s back: “Guilty minister Pei Xiaoyuan, kowtow to Your Majesty.”

The emperor did not move, but said in a leisurely voice: “Come here. Come to Zhen’s side.” His voice was unexpectedly gentle.

Pei Xiaoyuan stood up, climbed up the slope, and stopped behind the emperor’s sedan chair.

“What can you see?” asked the emperor.

Pei Xiaoyuan looked ahead in the direction of his gaze. Under the cold half-moonlight of the night, the vast wilderness stretched endlessly before them. From near to far, mounds of earth dotted the landscape—some tall, some low, some freshly piled, and others weathered by time, collapsed into the ground or entirely exposed. White bones, half-buried in shallow soil, had been unearthed and dragged out by stray dogs. Farther away, beyond the reach of the moonlight, dim green flames flickered and floated in the darkness, which was the will-o’-the-wisp carrying the ownerless dead, wandering around with the night wind.

“Zhen went to see Hao’er last night, and she said she was going to look for her mother. She didn’t know that her mother was right here, buried somewhere. Or worse, maybe she was abandoned in the wild, and now her body is gone.”

The emperor’s restrained and calm voice rang in Pei Xiaoyuan’s ears. A flash of surprise flashed in his eyes, and he suddenly turned to the emperor.

After a moment of silence, the emperor looked at the wilderness in the distance under the dark night and continued, “Back then, when she and her mother had an accident, Zhen was completely unaware of it. Zhen truly failed them. At that time, Zhen was leading the troops, constantly on the move across various places. What Zhen thought about most every day was how to suppress the rebellion, and didn’t go back to pick them up in person. Zhen never dreamed that Chang’an would be captured so quickly. Months later, Zhen received news on the battlefield that the city had been captured before the people who were supposed to pick them up arrived, and the whereabouts of the mother and daughter were unknown.

“The war was intense at that time, and Zhen couldn’t get away to go back and personally look for them, so Zhen could only send people to search for them everywhere. It was also at that time that rumors about her mother began to spread…”

The emperor paused.

“It was Zhen who was too foolish. On one hand, Zhen told oneself that this could not be true, but on the other hand, Zhen had already begun to believe it inside. By the time the war settled, Chang’an was recovered, and Zhen ascended the throne, the rumors were already rampant. Zhen never found out where she and Hao’er were, but that night there was a city guard who swore he saw her fleeing with the painter, running as if in desperation. That guard worked for Zhen and would not lie. It was also at that time that Zhen completely believed the rumors, and Zhen was disheartened and furious…”

The emperor stopped talking and slowly closed his eyes.

Pei Xiaoyuan was silent.

“Zhen was too foolish to have doubted her mother…” After a moment, the emperor muttered it again.

“Later, Zhen found Zhao Zhongfang, who Zhen thought had died in the war. By then, the overall situation had been decided, the empress and the crown prince were in place, and Liu Ceye led a group of noble families in the interior to serve as Zhen’s right-hand men. Zhao Zhongfang did not dare to tell Zhen the whole truth immediately. He only said that princess consort was ordered to enter the palace that night and did not come back, and Hao’er was lost when the city was broken. Until one day, it was Hao’er’s birthday. He was ordered to go to the prince mansion to manage affairs. After he came back, he suddenly burst into tears in the middle of the night and told Zhen everything. Zhen took one own’s anger at him, scolded him for not informing Zhen immediately when he returned to the palace, and expelled him from the palace.

“He is a eunuch, and he’s just taking blame for Zhen. Even if he told Zhen the truth at the beginning, or even if Zhen knew about it when Zhen ascended the throne, Zhen’s afraid Zhen would not have done anything…”

The emperor’s voice sounded even more desolate in the night wind that swept across the mass grave.

“The previous emperor enjoyed himself for half his life, leaving behind a devastated country. When Zhen first ascended the throne, the population of the country dropped drastically, and the treasury was empty. Inside, regional military commissioners were biding their time, waiting to see which way the winds would turn. Outside, there were powerful enemies from the Western Regions, eyeing us covetously. The various tribes in the Wolf Court also established their own kings, and the situation was complicated. There was also the Jingsheng faction, long entrenched and deeply rooted. Half of the ministers who now stand in Zhen’s court likely once pledged loyalty to him. What can Zhen do? Zhen can only endure it and pretend that Zhen know nothing…”

The emperor slowly clenched his palms, and his joints creaked.

“Later, Zhen secretly investigated and finally tracked down the former leader of the Liu family guards who had fled because he was afraid of being silenced. Only then Zhen learned that Ding Baiya was seriously injured and fell into the water and died that night. The guards brought her mother into the palace. The poisonous woman was delayed because of the incident, and was afraid that she would not be able to escape when the rebels arrived, so she fled in a hurry. She left behind an order to kill her and abandon her in the mass grave outside the city. Even in death, she still wanted to humiliate her. The guard leader obeyed the order, and after, he too escaped.”

The emperor turned and looked at Pei Xiaoyuan.

“Pei family’s son, Zhen couldn’t answer a single question that Hao’er asked last night. How could Zhen dare to let her know that her mother was abandoned here many years ago, either trampled by bandits or eaten by wild dogs. Zhen can no longer find any trace of her.”

Pei Xiaoyuan knelt down towards the wilderness in front of him and bowed solemnly.

The emperor looked at bowing figure and continued, “When Zhen first ascended the throne, Zhen needed everyone to work together and stabilize the court. The more important reason is that Xifan is still a major concern.

“No matter if it’s Heavens’ will or human machination, since Zhen took over the country, Zhen must safeguard it. Zhen doesn’t know what will happen to the world fifty or a hundred years after Zhen’s death, and Zhen can’t control it. At least while Zhen is still alive, Zhen will never allow even an inch of the land that our imperial ancestors bled for and fought to win beyond the borders to be lost. Even if it’s a barren land!

“Since Zhen ascended the throne, Zhen have been preparing for a decisive battle with Xifan. This has been the foremost priority after securing the throne. Zhen have been preparing for more than ten years, and finally three years ago, Zhen was able to avenge the previous humiliation and restore the prestige of our holy dynasty. Pei family’s son, you are among them, you have made great contributions for Zhen.”

Pei Xiaoyuan bowed to the emperor and said, “This is the duty of this minister.”

The emperor half leaned on the sedan chair, looked at the face in front of him under the moonlight that always remained calm and respectful, and smiled.

“Pei family’s son, Zhen admire you very much. But Zhen also know that your mind is not pure. You are still brooding over the past. You have other intentions when you come to the capital this time. If you get the chance, you will definitely kill a lot of people.”

Pei Xiaoyuan suddenly raised his eyes and met the two gazes the emperor shot at him.

At this moment, he was no longer the husband and father who was immersed in grief and self-blame for the past a moment ago. His expression shifted into awry amusement, and his gaze gleamed with a cold, cutting sharpness, like the edge of a blade, but his tone of voice was still kind, soft-spoken and slow.

“Now that the war in Xifan has ended, the world is gradually recovering. If Zhen prediction is correct, Zhen’s longevity celebration will be another battlefield where all the side will show their swords.

“Zhen has betrayed Hao’er’s mother, and also not been a good father to Hao’er. Zhen feel guilty, so Zhen had not dared to return to the prince mansion for so many years. Fortunately, Heavens still has some mercy. Zhen cannot give her mother back. What Zhen can give is the best Zhen have, no matter whether she likes it or not. Zhen dare not even ask for her forgiveness. Now that Zhen’s daughter is alive and has returned, Zhen is already satisfied. In any case, before Zhen leave, Zhen will give an explanation to Princess Consort and Zhen’s daughter.”

Pei Xiaoyuan was surprised and feeling dazed as he listened to the emperor’s heartfelt words. The face of the girl, whom he could clearly see with his eyes closed, appeared in front of him.

“Do you know why Zhen summoned you here tonight to say these words?” Suddenly he heard the emperor ask himself again.

“This minister stupid. Please enlighten, Your Majesty.” He came to his senses and responded.

“Hao’er may not know it yet, but Zhen know that she likes you. So, Zhen want you to stay away from her. Otherwise, Zhen is afraid that you will hurt her in the future. The more she likes you, the more you will hurt her.”

The emperor stared at the young man in front of him and spoke slowly in a low but clear voice.

At first, Pei Xiaoyuan was visibly shaken by the emperor’s words, his face showing an expression of extreme surprise. He was about to defend himself, however, when his eyes met the emperor’s gaze, he hesitated, paused, and in the end, everything fell into silence.

He neither accepted the order nor said that he refused.

All that could be heard was the sound of the wind whistling across the fields.

The emperor, who had been sitting for a long time, suddenly stood up slowly from his sedan chair.

“Pei family’s son, since Zhen have told you those things, Zhen can naturally give you another chance. Do you dare to swear that no matter what happens in the future, you will never let her down and protect her for the rest of your life?”

The emperor’s answer was still silence.

The emperor nodded, and his expression turned cold. He glared at the young minister in front of him and said coldly: “Pei Xiaoyuan, accept the order!”

Pei Xiaoyuan knelt down slowly.

“Listen, tonight Zhen will let you go, and you can pass on to her what Zhen told you later. Tomorrow, find an excuse to move out on your own. From then on, continue with whatever you should be doing, but do not approach her again. If you dare to disobey and secretly continue seeing her behind Zhen’s back, it will not be so easy for you to get out of the dungeon next time.”

After the emperor finished giving his orders, he did not even sit on the sedan chair, but put his hands behind his back and walked away. Han Kerang, who was waiting at a distance, saw this and signaled a few of his trusted followers to carry the sedan chair, while he walked quickly to meet the emperor.

The group quickly disappeared into the dark wilderness, leaving Pei Xiaoyuan alone.

He stood there for a long while, and finally, he walked down the barren slope and returned towards the city gate.

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