Chapter 100 Part 2

 

It was raining heavily that night, but the Jinwu Guards did not relax their curfew at all. Along the way, he encountered several groups of night patrols. One group informed him that at the third watch, they had seen the palace eunuch Yang Za’ien with two guards and another person. The person was wearing an oil coat and a rain hat. This person’s identity was unclear, but given Yang Zaien’s presence, they dared not inquire further. The group had ridden toward the Yanxing Gate.

Pei Xiaoyuan rushed to Yanxing Gate and asked the guards guarding the gate. As expected, Yang Zai’en took people out of the city.

Riding his horse out of the city gate, Pei Xiaoyuan rushed to the mass grave in the wilderness.

The black sky pressed low, swallowing stars and moon alike. In the wilds, the rain, driven by the gusting wind, poured down in torrents. The cowhide lantern to light the way that was tied to the front of Jinwuzhui had long been extinguished by the storm. Rain had also seeped into the tops of his boots. Following his memory, Pei Xiaoyuan arrived at the ridge he had visited before and searched the area thoroughly, but she was nowhere to be found.

His intuition convinced him that she was in this wilderness, but he had not seen her yet. He expanded his search and continued to look for her. Finally, he dismounted and climbed to the top of a hill, where he stood and looked at the surroundings.

At first, there was nothing to be seen except the dark rain curtain. The wild dogs running for food and the will-o’-the-wisps that carried the souls of the dead all disappeared tonight.

He continued to search, and suddenly, the pair of eyes under the brim of his rain hat froze.

Finally, at the end of the night rain as far as the eyes could see, he caught a glimpse of a hazy, flickering light.

Pei Xiaoyuan rushed down the hilltop, jumped onto the horse’s back, and drove towards the source of the light.

Yang Zai’en was wearing a straw raincoat, protecting a glass lamp in his hand. At this moment, he was standing beside a wild stream flowing around a mass grave.

He looked at the figure still standing on the shore in the distance, feeling extremely anxious.

He could not fathom why the princess had chosen, in the dead of the night, to forgo sleep and the company of her newlywed husband, venturing out alone into the rain to quietly leave the city and came to this mass grave. But he vaguely understood in his heart that the princess came here to pay tribute to a deceased person.

Beyond the city walls, the wind and rain grew fierce, no longer softened as within the city. Although she had a rain hat and oil coat, he was afraid that it had failed to keep her dry. He wanted to step forward and urge her to return but hesitated, unwilling to disturb the figure that stood so resolutely on the water bank. As anxiety gnawed at him, he suddenly caught the sound of hoofbeats faintly carried through the storm. He turned around and saw a rider coming from the depths of the wilderness through the rain curtain and soon approaching.

Yang Zai’en recognized the person coming, breathed a sigh of relief, and turned around to greet him with the lantern.

Pei Xiaoyuan said a few words to him, not bothering to wipe the water off his face, dismounted and strode towards the figure in front of him who was still unaware.

Xuyu stood alone by the water’s edge, gazing intently at the ink-dark stream swirling in front of her feet. How long she had been standing there, she no longer knew.

A gust of wind and rain suddenly blew towards her from the depths of the wilderness across the wild water. The ferocity of it made her stagger, unable to keep her footing. The straps of her rain hat were also broken by the strong wind and it flew away from her head in an instant. The cold rain unimpededly rushed towards her face, and swiftly trickled down her neck into her clothes. She couldn’t open her eyes for a while, and her body was swaying in the strong wind. When she was about to fall to the water’s edge, suddenly a hand reached out from behind, steadying her by her waist. Then, another rain hat made of oiled felt was gently placed over her brow. Her feet left the ground as she was lifted effortlessly, her entire body resting securely in a pair of strong arms.

Pei Xiaoyuan felt the person in his arms resisting, as if unwilling to be taken away like this. He lowered his head and whispered, “It’s time for you to go back!”

After a brief sentence, he carried her, who was still struggling, through the muddy ground, and got on Jinwuzhui’s back. Pulling her firmly into his arms, he finally subdued her resistance. After shielding her from the wind and rain with his straw raincoat, he looked around and determined the direction. Yang Zaien ran to the horse and said, “From here, returning to the city would be farther—at least twenty to thirty miles. But heading north, just ten miles away, is Changle Slope. Prince Consort, why not take the Princess to rest and wait out the rain at Changle Posthouse!”

He had already traveled twenty miles from the city to the mass grave, then wandered another ten miles in search of her. By now, this place was indeed near Changle Slope, just north of the city.

Pei Xiaoyuan turned his horse around and headed north. Finally, at the end of the Zi hour (11 pm – 1 am), he passed through a wild autumn forest under Changle Slope and knocked on the door of Changle Posthouse.

The postmaster surnamed Hu, who was on duty tonight, recognized that the late-night visitor was Pei Xiaoyuan. Noticing the palace eunuch Yang Zai’en accompanying him with two guards, and seeing that Pei had brought along a woman dressed in plain attire, he couldn’t help but observe her. Though much of her face was obscured by a rain hat, it was clear she was a young and beautiful woman.

Everyone knew that Pei Xiaoyuan had just married a princess. The postmaster guessed that the woman must be the newlywed princess who had just married her prince consort.

Even if it wasn’t, he would do his best to welcome them because of the favor he had received when Pei Xiaoyuan stayed here at the beginning of the year. Although he had some doubts in his heart, wondering why the Prince Consort would bring the Princess here in such a disheveled state on a stormy night, he dared not ask questions. Instead, he eagerly welcomed them in, swiftly escorting them to an unoccupied upper room. Soon after, lanterns, hot water, fragrant towels, tea, a warming brazier, and clean clothes from head to toe were also quickly delivered.

Pei Xiaoyuan closed the door and turned around.

She remained seated on a pearwood bed, her rain-soaked hair already disheveled, clinging messily to her face and neck, which only made her pale complexion more striking. The small star-shaped mark on the skin between her brows stood out even more. Her gaze was vacant, her mind was distracted, as if parts of her soul were still wandering outside her body and had yet to return. She made no effort to remove the oilskin raincoat draped over her shoulders, allowing water to continue dripping from it, pooling into a damp stain beneath her.

He walked quickly to her and called “Princess” softly. Seeing that she still did not respond, he hesitated for a moment, whispered “Excuse me”, and took the liberty of removing the raincoat himself. As he did, he realized that the garments she wore underneath were also nearly soaked through.

When she left the Yongning Mansion, she was not wearing much, just a purple embroidered jacket over her middle garment. The double-layered silk fabric could not withstand the soaking of rain. At this moment it was tightly clung to her body, making the undulating curves of her body fully outlined by the wet clothes, with no cover at all.

Pei Xiaoyuan felt his eyes getting hot. Forcing himself not to look any longer, he turned his gaze away calmly, then raised his voice slightly: “Princess!” After calling her, he noticed she finally moved, her eyes still clouded with confusion, but she turned toward him.

“You’re soaked, and there’s no one here to assist you. Just change your clothes and rest.”

He looked into her gradually clearing eyes, speaking softly. After that, he made no further attempt to look at her. He moved the warming brazier closer to her, then brought over the towel, dry clothes, and other items that had been prepared, placing them beside her. Once done, he retreated behind a screen, turning his back to her, and waited.

For a while there was only silence from her direction, and then there was small noises. The rustling sounds of people stripping and putting on clothes, and the sounds of people wiping hair, were clearly heard by Pei Xiaoyuan through the semi-transparent silk covering the wooden frame of the screen.

He kept his eyelids slightly lowered, his eyes on his nose, and his nose pointed at his heart. After about an incense stick of time, the noise behind the screen gradually stopped. He waited for a moment, then slowly turned his head and looked back.

Through the layer of silk, he could vaguely see that she had got onto the bed and lay down.

Steadying himself, Pei Xiaoyuan finally stepped out from behind the screen. He gently lowered the bed canopy for her, then took her wet clothing and draped it over the warming brazier. Returning behind the screen, he removed his own clothes, which were also almost completely soaked. Fortunately, the shoulders of the raincoat had two layers, so the wound was not wet. He changed into a set of underclothes prepared by the postmaster, tidied up, and came out from behind the screen again. Pausing before the bed with its lowered curtain, he hesitated briefly, realizing there seemed to be only one quilt on the bed. After standing for a while, he finally climbed onto the only bed in the room.

He did not lift the quilt, and just took a clean piece of clothing and casually wrapped it around his waist.

The brazier under the window emitted a circle of red light through its hole. Pei Xiaoyuan’s eyesight adjusted to the dim light coming into the bed canopy. After a moment, he slowly opened his eyes, turned around, and looked at her beside him.

As soon as she lay down, she pulled the quilt up high, covering her head and face completely. She did not make any sound, as if she had fallen asleep like this.

“Princess, why didn’t you wake me up and let me go with you?”

In the dim light inside the canopy, he looked for a moment at the vague outline of her rising and falling body under the quilt, and suddenly his heart was filled with some emotions that he couldn’t explain.

“You leave the city late at night in such weather. If something goes wrong, how will I face His Majesty’s punishment?”

After he finished speaking, he realized that what he said was inappropriate, as it seemed that he was angry. However, he had already said it and could not take it back. And he did not want to take it back.

After waiting for a long time, he still couldn’t get her answer. But Pei Xiaoyuan knew that she was clearly awake. He suddenly felt a little depressed, and finally closed his eyes sullenly.

Although Changle Posthouse was not far from Chang’an City, there were few villages around it and it was located alone among the wild woods. The wind was usually strong at night, let alone tonight.

He listened to the incessant rustling sound of the night rain outside the posthouse, feeling upset and confused. He felt that tonight would be another sleepless night. Suddenly, he noticed something strange around him and opened his eyes again to turn to her.

“Princess?”

After hesitating for a moment, he spoke again, calling out tentatively.

She still didn’t answer. He reached out to pull down the quilt covering her head and face, but she stopped him, tightly grasping the corner of the quilt with her fingers, not allowing him to move it.

If he had hesitated before, now he no longer did. With a slight exertion, he yanked the quilt from her hands. She immediately turned over, lying face down on the pillow, her shoulders and back trembling slightly.

Pei Xiaoyuan gently pushed aside a strand of her dark hair that was draped over the pillow, revealing half of her face. As soon as he touched it, he could feel the dampness and coldness on her skin.

She was actually crying silently, but she had been holding it back and hadn’t made any sound.

Pei Xiaoyuan suddenly panicked.

“Princess, please don’t cry. I deserve to die for speaking to you like that just now!”

However, it would have been better if he hadn’t said it. After he said that, she seemed to be unable to hold it in any longer. Her shoulders and back trembled even more violently, and she could finally no longer suppress her sobs.

“It has nothing to do with you, Master Pei. Don’t bother me…” She shook her head wildly, pressed her face deeply into the pillow, and sobbed softly.

Pei Xiaoyuan got up, reached out to hug her, and gently turned her back over from the pillow. He tucked the quilt around her again, was about to get out of bed to light the lamp and see what was going on when suddenly, she reached out from behind and grabbed his sleeve tightly.

“Don’t go!” She unexpectedly asked him to stay.

Pei Xiaoyuan felt as if his heart was completely stolen away by those words.

He immediately sat back down: “I’m not going anywhere,” he replied softly. Then, leaning his shoulder and arm gently against her, he remained still. For a long time, he stayed by her side until her sobs subsided and her emotions gradually settled.

“On a night like this, in such weather, and at such a late hour, the Princess went out of the city alone to worship, yet refuses to return with me. This is certainly out of great filial piety, but if Empress Zhaode’s spirit in heaven is aware, how can she rest in peace?”

After careful consideration, this was what he ultimately chose to say.

“I’m sorry…” She said in a muffled and slightly hoarse voice, “I made you worry.”

“It’s just that I wanted to stay there with my mother…”

Pei Xiaoyuan was slightly stunned, and lowered his head. In the dim red light that penetrated into the canopy, he looked at the hazy face reflected on the pillow.

“The night before we got married, something happened.” She calmed herself down.

“I went to look for my father and found him just returning from the east suburbs. He told me that he had gone to worship a fairy, praying that she could bless me. At that time, I believed it to be true. Today, I know that he must have gone to the mass grave in the east suburbs to tell Mother about me…”

A tear that had just stopped flowing silently from the corner of her eye again.

“I also know that even my father couldn’t find my mother, so it’s even more impossible for me. It will never be possible. But it rained so hard tonight, and I don’t want my mother to be alone, wandering by herself in a place like that. I want to go and accompany her. If I go, my mother may not be so lonely…”

Tears blurred her eyes.

“If there hadn’t been the turmoil back then, and Father had never left me and my mother, how great would that be, right? In fact, I would rather hope that she really abandoned me and left with Ding Baiya. I won’t blame her, really…”

She choked on a sob, her breath catching as she suddenly realized she might have said far too much—things she shouldn’t have shared.

He remained silent and did not respond at all.

Abruptly, she stopped speaking, rolling away from the man beside her until her body curled up into the deepest corner of the bed.

“Alright, I’m fine now. Don’t worry about me. It’s late, and you must be tired, you should rest…”

She pressed her eyelids hard with the back of her hands to stop the tears from coming out, and spoke vaguely.

“Princess, if you want to accompany Empress Zhaode again in the future, no matter when, remember to tell me. Empress Zhaode may find it more lively if we go together.”

At this moment, a gentle and calm voice sounded in her ears.

When Xuyu heard his words, she froze for a moment. Then, with a choked sob, she turned and threw herself from the corner of the bed into the arms of the man who was leaning against her. She pressed her tear-stained face against his chest, and even stretched out her arms, hugged his waist and back tightly, and then choked up again.

Pei Xiaoyuan had hugged her more than once before, but he had never been hugged so tightly by her. Moreover, it was such a scene, where the two of them were lying within the enclosed bed, clad in nothing but thin layers of undergarments, their chests and abdomens touching, the soft feeling was almost the same as being naked.

At first, he froze, unable to move, and dared not move. But soon, as her muffled cries filled his ears, he closed his eyes, forcing himself to steady his breathing. In the faint red glow of the brazier, one of his arms wrapped around her shoulders while the other slipped around her waist, drawing her fully into his embrace. His hand moved to her back, gently patting in a calming rhythm.

“Princess, if you want to cry, just cry. You don’t have to hold it back.”

He put his lips to her ear and whispered.

Outside the posthouse, the late autumn wind and rain had finally subsided. By dawn, the storm had ceased, leaving the countryside shrouded in drifting mist.

In the faint echo of Chang’an’s morning drumbeats carrying across the distant fields, Pei Xiaoyuan’s eyelids twitched slightly.

Awaken from an indescribable morning dream, he felt a lingering discomfort in his body. Opening his eyes, which still bore traces of unspoken emotion, he turned his head. In the dim morning light filtering through the room, he saw her exactly as she had been when she cried herself to sleep in his arms last night. Her forehead rested lightly against his chest, where her movements had left his robe disheveled. Her body remained curled up, completely still.

She appeared to still be deep in slumber, showing no sign of waking.

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